This Year, I Choose Me!

(This article is written by Center Advisory Council member Garry Haraveth)

With resolutions in the air, one trend is that most people choose a single word to guide their year, such as intentional, brave, or growth. This year, I choose ME!

As we step into a new year, we’re often invited to choose a word to guide us for the year.

These are often popular words I hear from clients, friends, and family:

Intentional

Brave

Grounded

Growth

They’re good words. Familiar words. Words about doing, becoming, improving.

As this year begins, I’m choosing something different. My word for the year is me.

Not better me.

Not future me.

Not the version of me that performs well, keeps the peace, or carries more than is mine.

Just… me.

Choosing “me” as I begin this year isn’t about shrinking the world down to myself or turning away from what’s happening around us. It’s about how I want to show up in that world. It’s about committing to lead my life from alignment rather than reaction, from clarity rather than obligation.

Over time, I’ve learned something important, something I want to let guide this year:

When we disconnect from ourselves, we lose our power.
When we return to ourselves, everything else gets clearer.

That disconnection doesn’t usually happen all at once. It happens in small, repeated ways, like saying yes when we mean no, pushing past our limits, and quieting our voice to keep things smooth. Remembering this is part of why I’m choosing “me” now, at the start of a new year.

So as this year begins, I’m practicing a return.

A return to my values.
A return to my voice.
A return to my limits and my capacity.

The guiding question I’m carrying with me into this year is simple, but grounding:

Does this bring me closer to me?

It’s a question I intend to ask before I say yes.
A question I’ll return to when I feel pulled in too many directions.
A question I’ll sit with when something feels off but I can’t yet explain why.

To support that intention, I’m using what I think of as my “Me” filter, a short set of questions to help translate awareness into action:

• Is this aligned with my values?

• Does this honor my energy and limits?

• Am I reacting, or am I choosing?

• Does this bring me closer to me?
  

I also want to stay attentive to the signals along the way: the tightness in my body, the urge to over-explain, the familiar “I should…” that often appears when something isn’t aligned. I’ve learned to see these not as failures, but as information, valuable data, to help guide me through the year ahead.

This year isn’t about making perfect choices. It’s about making self-honoring ones and trusting myself enough to adjust as I go.

When I need something even simpler, I’ll return to my guiding question:

Does this bring me closer to me?

No dramatic reinvention required.
No rigid plan to follow.

Just a steady, intentional return - again and again.

If you’re choosing a word for the year, or feeling resistant to the whole idea, I’ll offer this gentle invitation as we start the year together:
What might change if improvement wasn’t the goal?
What if returning to yourself was enough?

Here’s to beginning the year with alignment over obligation.
With clarity over noise.
With a commitment to choose ourselves, not once, but throughout the year.

Garry serves on the Cortland LGBTQ Center Advisory Council. He is an educator, activist, and empowerment life coach (certified), and the founder of Gay Life Journey (gaylifejourney.com).